Saturday, June 27, 2009

"Finally, a POINT!"

So, I think it is time that I wrote a blog worth reading, for a change. Enough of the pointless rambling (although I must admit, it is quite fun), I want to write a blog with meaning and feeling.

Not to mention, this is something I've been wanting to blog out about for quite some time.

Here we go.

I'd like to talk a lot about God and the things that I've experienced with Him.


I have always craved a wonderful relationship with my Father in Heaven. I think it's more than difficult to describe a good relationship with God.

Seeing as everyone is different, the relationships we have with God are going to be different, as well. It's hard to say what a "good relationship" is, and what isn't, because God knows what he wants to do with each person, and maybe that person is experiencing things that we cannot see.

Anyway, I've always wanted a special relationship with Him. I have shared things with God (feelings I mean) where I know that He is right next to me. Sometimes I feel as if He is literally just holding my heart and refilling it with His love and compassion. Others, I feel like He is filling my head with knowlege.

Sometimes I can feel Him living through me, and I can't help but smile and jump around. Because it is so exciting to have Him shine His light through me.

All of these amazing things, happen to me quite often. I'll randomly feel His love surrounding me.


Sometimes I feel completely isolated and distant from Him. Like a big cloud or bubble is surrounding me and blocking my heart from God. Sometimes I feel hesitant and don't know how I can reach out to Him once again. I don't feel Him anymore, and as much as I hate it, He feels gone.

It's so very irritating, I will tell you that!

Each time I feel Him around me, and feel His love helping me through the day, I always think, "I've finally got Him to myself. Forever. FINALLY I can maintain this wonderful feeling and relationship that I've got right now. This feeling will last forever. I never again will feel without God."

And within a couple of days, it's back to the same old same old. Something is guarding my heart and blocking out His love.

But what is it?! I've got no idea.

I have noticed that I find God in many different places.

For example, when I wake up in the weeee hours of the morning, and go out to sit on the front porch, I can just see and feel God everywhere.

Basically anytime I am outdoors, I can feel God right next to me.

It's quite strange, but maybe that is the way it's supposed to be. For me, anyway.

Also, I have considered that sometimes I get distracted. Everything in life overtakes me, and my reality becomes more important than my spiritual world. It's almost like it's two different worlds, which definitely isn't good.

My reality SHOULD BE my spiritual world.

I've prayed constantly about this. God obviously knows what He is doing with me, but I simply can't understand why at times, I feel so distant from Him and seem to forget about what is important.

I think that everything my life just begins to pile on top of one another, and I get stressed about it all, so I worry about taking care of things before I worry about taking care of things with God.

Which is really stupid of me, because if only I would turn to God first, He could help me through it all.

I have no idea what it is that seems to randomly block my heart from God's love and knowlege. It could be Satin, it could be distraction, it could be something God is trying to show me.

I don't know. But I hope I find out soon.

If you've got ideas or anything, I'd love to hear them. :)

In the meantime, I'll just continue with my prayers.

Friday, June 26, 2009

"If everyday was Easter, we could have chocolate bunnies whenever we wanted."

I never post anymore. I think it got boring, haha. I always type in "", sign in, and set my curser on the "New Post" button. However, I then think, "What is there to say?", and exit out.

Even here, now, there is hardly much to say, but this time I forced myself to click the New Post button. I don't why, but I did. So here we are.

I'm very tired right now, so nothing will be interesting or probably even make since.

This morning, my mom, dad, and I, woke at 6am for coffee on the porch. It's a little crazy, but it was fun and I like it when we do weird things like that. However, considering I went to bed at about 2 and woke at 6, a large nap will be needed later on today.

Now I will completely change the subject.

I can't believe Michael Jackson is freaking dead. AND Ferral Fawcett (I've got no idea how to spell her name, ugh.)

I figure that everywhere we look for next week or so, we'll see or hear about Michael Jackson's death. Why not add fuel to the fire? Hahaha.

I honestly can't say that I feel much saddness. I do feel sorry for his kids and the like, but I never really knew anything about the guy.

I heard he mollested kids or something, but was proven innocent. I don't know what's true and what's not. I've considered doing research, but I don't see what it would matter. For my own bennefit, I suppose. Maybe I will.

I do, however, remember seeing pictures of him with his small child hanging over the balcony. Considering it was an actual picture that I saw many times as a young child, I'm pretty sure that one is true.

I don't understand WHY he would want to throw his kid over the edge. Publicity is more than likely the solution to that one. Who wants THAT kind of publicity, though?

Anyway, I also don't understand why on earth he ruined his face. As a young black man, he was pretty attractive. I understand he got the disease where your skin slowly starts to turn white, so he bleached his skin.

Who wants to be blochy? I would have done the same.

HOWEVER, his constant nose surgeries make him look like he belongs in a horror film. And he wears lipstick. GROSE!

Okay, so I didn't know the guy, or much about him. I don't think anyone really did. It's hard to clarify the difference in the truth and all the rumors and lies.


Alright this is probably long enough, aha.


Thursday, June 4, 2009

"How exactly do you MAKE fish soup? -You pick up a fat fish and squeeze. Why do you think there are so many fish tanks in here??"

I am excited for the following:


2. Me, my mom, and Sophie (one of my dogs) are leaving tomorrow for my grandmother's house and the lake!! :)


4. I recently found out our family IS taking a beach vacation soon, after all!

5. My mouth doesn't hurt anymore! (Unless I try and eat something...haha :/ )

6. I'm getting a FISH! Maybe even two! =]

Okay. It is now time for explanations.

1. The book arrived sixteen freaking days late, but that's okay because it is finally HERE and in great condition, haha. I got it this afternoon, and have only gotten 100 pages into the book. So far, it's great and only getting better. I now have 1, 2, and 3 and will be recieving the rest in a couple of weeks.

2. Tomorrow we will go to my grandma's house, who lives with my aunt and cousins. We'll stay there that day and night and then we'll ALL (including many other families inside of our family) travel to the lake to celebrate my twin aunt's and cousin's birthday! Lakes are FUN! Anyway, I'm not sure when I'll be back. Soon, I know, but hopefully not TOO soon. Also we get to take Sophie. That should be interesting. I'm taknig my camera and will take LOTS of pictures, if remembered!

3. Four hours of driving will be quite enjoyable! :) I love to drive, hahaha.

4. My sister mentioned the other day (my parent's didn't even freaking tell me) that in two weeks we're going to the beach. I find this very exciting because, 1) my mom said there probably wouldn't be room for a beach trip this year and 2) I absolutely LOVE the beach. We'll be gone for like five days I think.

5. Only sometimes and if I eat. Soups and non solid foods are getting REALLY OLD! Stupid braces.

6. I've been begging for a fish or two. I know it sounds strange because kids never want fish. But I DO! I want two big fat ones to sit in my room in there adorably decorated fish tank where I will give them lots of attention and make sure they are always well taken care of! (that includes keeping my fat cat from trying to eat them). But I have to talk my mom into it. As if fish are a big responsibility, she's "not sure". Hahahaha, wow.

Okay I'm going to go now and read some more before bed. I should get sleep, though, it's going to be an early and long day tomorrow. (Yet fun!:D)

-See ya!

P.S. No one in the family is supposed to know that we'll be there tomorrow and accompanying them to the lake. Therefore, if you are not a family member do not tell. And if you ARE, you are not supposed to know, so keep quiet and don't tell mom! :) Hahaha.

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

"A birds going to poop on you. And it's going to burn. One pooped on me once.... it burnt."

I'm very disappointed at this moment.

It's been over TWO WEEKS since I ordered my books. Let me fill you in.

I finished Breaking Dawn a while ago, and decided I should definately read the Harry Potter books. Although we had already owned them, they were no where to be found because clearly we had loaned them out and never gotten them back.

All that was left was the second one.

So, remembering my cousin really enjoyed the books, I texted my aunt immediately asking her if she had them. She too had loaned a few of them out and like us, never got them back. HOWEVER, she DID have the fourth, fifth, six and seventh. Keep in mind, I had the second.

All that was needed was the first and third.

So I got online and ordered them both. They were supposed to be in a long time ago. Finally today the third one came in. I guess you could say that was exciting. But I would say it's just a big mess of misery. I have to sit staring at my new Harry Potter book, without even being able to read it.

And all because the FIRST one is taking years to come in. I had my mom talked in to going to Hastings and just buying it there. We were going to be in Abilene anyway, to get my braces fixed, because as you probably expected, I already broek them.

So that was the plan. Orthodontist and then Hastings.

But she checked her email and it said that it HAD been shipped, after all. So, she says I should "Just be patient and wait for it to come. It will eventually." EVENTUALLY being the key word.

Ugh. So anyway, she says it should be in tomorrow but who knows? I've been briefly reading, "He's just not that into you", but it's nothing compared to Harry Potter.

Okay, enough about the books. I hadn't meant for this to go on so long.

Actually I hadn't planned on anything for this blog.

I guess I should go on and end it.

But I must leave you with this AMAZING piece of information:


If you are unfamiliar with that name, let me refresh your memory.

If you've ever heard of the show "18 Kids and Counting", then you ought to understand.

Anywho, there is a family called the Duggars. They have 18 children, and plan on having more. Their family is VERY conservative and modest. They're home schooled, and they don't watch much TV or get on the computer often. As crazy as it sounds, they are pretty down to earth and definately well behaved.

Anyway, their oldest son, Josh recently married a girl named Amy.

They're very cute and now not long after their marriage, they are PREGNAT!

I find it very exciting, although you may not.

Alright that's all for now.

P.S. I want to write. Like a story of some kind. But I want it to be long. So if you have any ideas or inspirations for me, of any kind, let me know! :)